Is Maroons the Worst Name in College Sports?
Not Quite
Rob Bachmann, '07
Issue date: 2/16/06 Section: Arts & Entertainment
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While the University of Chicago is definitely not known as a sport powerhouse, I feel that its team name is quite pathetic. For those of you who don't know, we are the University of Chicago Maroons (and I assume the women's teams are known as the Lady Maroons?). Once, I even saw our mascot, which is a big red sphere with a smiley face. While our team name is pretty bad, it occurred to me that there are several schools with even worse team names then ours. So, without further ado, here are eight schools with worse team names than ours (Why eight? Because it was hard to think of ten).
8) Akron (Team name: Zips): Their name is the zips and their mascot is a kangaroo. No wonder they have trouble recruiting players.
7) Syracuse (Team name: Orangemen): Syracuse went one step further than the University of Chicago, and added men to the end of their color. For those wondering, the women's team is just called the Orange, not the Orangewomen or the Lady Orangemen.
6) UC Santa Cruz (Team name: Banana Slugs): Nothing is more intimidating than a slug. No wonder I'm terrified of weeding my garden.
5) Arizona, Kentucky, Northwestern, Kansas State, etc (Team name: Wildcats): There is nothing wrong with the team name Wildcats on its own, but what is wrong is that ten billion teams have this name, so they all lose on the account of no originality. I wonder how many times there has been a match-up of the Wildcats vs. the Wildcats? Too many times for my taste.
4) Tulane (Team name: Green Wave): The Tulane Green Wave is the distant, underappreciated step son of the Alabama Crimson Tide. I don't really know what their mascot is, but it would be really cool if it was a guy dressed up as a big green wave jumping around. It would also be great if the Lakers mascot was a guy dressed up like a lake.
3) UC Irvine (Team name: Anteaters): I'm from Irvine, so I am intimately familiar with the Anteaters. Their mascot is a guy in an Anteater suit named Zot; the epitome of world class athletics.
2) Oregon State (Team name: Beavers): Haha, you said beaver.
1) Stanford (Team name: Cardinal): The Stanford team name is simply confusing. It's the Cardinal, which is weird for several reasons. One is that the word cannot be pluralized (for example, an announcer will say that Stanford Cardinal is playing the UCLA Bruins). Also, I thought a cardinal was either a red bird or some sort of priest, but Stanford's mascot is a dancing tree (I know, I know, a smiling red sphere is WAY better than a dancing tree). Lastly I went to Cal, so I have to take any opportunity I have to bag on Stanford.
8) Akron (Team name: Zips): Their name is the zips and their mascot is a kangaroo. No wonder they have trouble recruiting players.
7) Syracuse (Team name: Orangemen): Syracuse went one step further than the University of Chicago, and added men to the end of their color. For those wondering, the women's team is just called the Orange, not the Orangewomen or the Lady Orangemen.
6) UC Santa Cruz (Team name: Banana Slugs): Nothing is more intimidating than a slug. No wonder I'm terrified of weeding my garden.
5) Arizona, Kentucky, Northwestern, Kansas State, etc (Team name: Wildcats): There is nothing wrong with the team name Wildcats on its own, but what is wrong is that ten billion teams have this name, so they all lose on the account of no originality. I wonder how many times there has been a match-up of the Wildcats vs. the Wildcats? Too many times for my taste.
4) Tulane (Team name: Green Wave): The Tulane Green Wave is the distant, underappreciated step son of the Alabama Crimson Tide. I don't really know what their mascot is, but it would be really cool if it was a guy dressed up as a big green wave jumping around. It would also be great if the Lakers mascot was a guy dressed up like a lake.
3) UC Irvine (Team name: Anteaters): I'm from Irvine, so I am intimately familiar with the Anteaters. Their mascot is a guy in an Anteater suit named Zot; the epitome of world class athletics.
2) Oregon State (Team name: Beavers): Haha, you said beaver.
1) Stanford (Team name: Cardinal): The Stanford team name is simply confusing. It's the Cardinal, which is weird for several reasons. One is that the word cannot be pluralized (for example, an announcer will say that Stanford Cardinal is playing the UCLA Bruins). Also, I thought a cardinal was either a red bird or some sort of priest, but Stanford's mascot is a dancing tree (I know, I know, a smiling red sphere is WAY better than a dancing tree). Lastly I went to Cal, so I have to take any opportunity I have to bag on Stanford.